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By and large, the understanding of sex in Judaism discussed above is standard among those live a Torah-observant life, but among more liberal Jews, premarital sex is not understood as a sin, necessarily.The Reform and Conservative movements have questioned (both formally and informally) the permissibility of a sexual relationship between individuals who are unmarried but are in a long-term, committed relationship.First, there’s a delightful web series called “Soon by You” (look it up on You Tube) that is all about the world of modern Orthodox dating. However, the word “Orthodox” is itself too broad to give an answer that covers both the more modern Orthodox world and the more insular Orthodox world, which would include Hasidic communities and what is called “Yeshiva” or “black hat” communities.In the more modern Orthodox circles men and women do meet in mixed social groups, such as a singles-oriented Sabbath dinner, or other social groups.On your way out, you comment to the manager about how little waiters earn for working so hard. Notice, incidentally, that in neither case was the touch sensual or even affectionate.Still, it had an undeniable effect, opening up new feelings of warmth and receptivity.I am Jewish and dating a non-Jewish woman who is considering conversion to Judaism.
However, although Jewish law, halacha, prefers and uplifts sex within the confines of marriage as the ultimate ideal, the Torah actually does not explicitly prohibit premarital sex.Traditional Judaism, always an astute observer of the human scene, stipulates that men and women who are not close relatives should exercise extreme caution and sensitivity in expressing affection for one another through touch.In short, Judaism says, Unless you’re close relatives or married to each other, don’t.And, like Super Glue, it must be handled very carefully, or it will end up sticking things together that would be better off not stuck.Touching another person (in Hebrew, negiah), as casually as its regarded in many circles, is far more powerful than most of us appreciate.
Judaism regards sex as being similar to eating and drinking in that it is is a natural and necessary aspect of life -- but within the right framework and context, with the proper intentions.